Practice today, the evening led first series, was so uneventful that I can't come up with anything remotely interesting to write about it. Since I blathered on for as long as I did yesterday, I figured today I would take a break and instead submit some humor sent to us in an e-mail by a dear friend who has just returned from Mysore. That's her in Trikonasana and here again, the second hottie from the left (the first hottie on the left is my wife). Welcome back Ms. Jones.

Joke #1

TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You retire on the income.

INDIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You worship them.

PAKISTAN ECONOMICS
You don't have any cows.
You claim that the Indian cows belong to you.
You ask the US for financial aid, China for military aid, Britain for
Warplanes, Italy for machines, Germany for technology, France for
Submarines, Switzerland for loans, Russia for drugs and Japan for equipment. You buy the cows with all this and claim of exploitation by the world.

AMERICAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You profess surprise when the cow drops dead.
You put the blame on some nation with cows & naturally that nation will be a danger to mankind. You wage a war to save the world and grab the cows.

FRENCH ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.

GERMAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You reengineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.

BRITISH ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
They are both mad.

ITALIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

SWISS ECONOMICS
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.

JAPANESE ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create cute cartoon cow images called Cowkimon and market them worldwide.

RUSSIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 17 cows.
You give up counting and open another bottle of vodka.

CHINESE ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.



Joke #2
Last month, a world-wide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was...
"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"

The survey was a huge failure because...

In Africa they didn't know what "food" means.
In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" means.
In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" means.
In China they didn't know what "opinion" means.
In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" means.
In South America they didn't know what "please" means.
In the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" means